I posted in our group because I honestly thought that people would intuitively get what I was trying to say. I understand that my perspective is not the norm. That when I hear about guys doing cross dressing as some sort of consequence of a bet I flinch. I know that is not what most will do. Most people will laugh. They will chuckle. It will be a topic for the weekend.You may hear about it on Monday Night Magic or The Eh! Team or some other podcast.
I am understanding of this cycle and as a Transsexual I know that I operate mentally on a different plane than most other women, let alone other people. I have met Brad Nelson and have heard generally good things about Gerry T. I know that the first thing or any part of the thought process was how can we offend women or Transgender people. So, I want that out of the way. This is not about Brad or Gerry.
This is about when to GP Providence an one of the TOs asked if I was wearing a dress and my breast forms because I lost a bet or if I was trying to put people on tilt when they lose to a guy in a dress. This is more about the fact that I already feel highly self conscious when I leave for an event. There are so many events that I refuse to go as myself. Because I am afraid of the way people perceive me. It’s bad enough in the normal world. In the Magic world, it is intensified.
First, I’m not really sure why it’d be more offensive to transgender people than women.
But most importantly, i’m not comfortable telling anyone that it’s not okay for them to dress a certain way. And in some ways, I’d expect you to feel even stronger about it than I do.
Like I said, just curios / open to the possibility that I’m missing something.
First off, I never said it was offensive to all Transgender women or not offensive to women. Also, I want to be way of the language. I prob don’t think it was the intent, under that wording it almost sounds like saying I am not a woman. I’ll move past that because I don’t want to assume anything.
This isn’t about whether or not anyone can dress one way or the other. That is an extrapolation that isn’t there. Yes, everyone should be able to dress any way that they want. But there is two layers here. Layer 1 is that dressing as a woman as a man is funny and embarrassing and uncomfortable and is an apt punishment or incentive for not wanting to lose a bet. I am not comfortable with that as a PERSON. Never have been. Even before coming out and we should think about that.
Layer 2 is that, as I have already stated, is that seeing this and the jokes on Twitter and the coverage screen makes me feel less good about myself. I am not blessed in my body shape. Despite my best efforts to some people I look like a guy with big boobs and wearing women’s clothing. That is my problem. But, the fact that it is what is means that when I go to SCG Providence people will think I have also lost a bet. Or some other silly thing. It becomes another reason for me not to want to dress the way I WANT to dress. An avenue has become less open to me.
I don’t know. I sit back and read all of everyone’s posts about sexism this and sexism that. When I weigh in, I do not try to de-legitimize the way someone feels. But as I sit and read this thread, I actually have felt like quitting this group. Except for those who I am friends with outside of our group, many people have taken the road of “just take a joke” or that this isn’t about Trans issues. I don’t know. Maybe I am in the wrong place. I didn’t want a debate. I just was posting that I didn’t like something and at the end of this, I feel like I was wrong for it.
